Bad News - NonBand Related

My brother in law had his surgery yesterday and the outcome is not good.  The tumor had already spread throughout his brain and it is malignant.  I don't know the name of the type of cancer it is but it's very bad and there isn't much they can do.  Radiation will only prolong his life, not save it.  The doctor is giving him 6 months to a year to live.  Apparently, it's the same kind of cancer Ted Kennedy had and he made it 10 months.

Needless to say, my sister is absolutely devastated.  She has two young children (5 and 3) and must be so scared of what all this means for them.  My heart is breaking for all of them.  Obviously very sad for my BIL, but I'm truly so so sad for his family...my sister, my niece, my nephew...his parents.  It's impossible to catch a flight back east right now (they live in South Carolina) with all the weather so my parents started driving yesterday afternoon.  They're hoping to drive straight through so it'll take about 36 hours to get there.  Unfortunately, everyone but my sister lives out here so she has no family with her right now.  Luckily, she's lived in that same town since she was 11 and has lots of close friends.  I know she's getting support but I feel so helpless being so far away.  I'm thinking I will make the trip in a few weeks...after the initial surge of friends and church people have made their way to their house.  After his parents have left (they live in Michigan).  I'm thinking if the family can stagger their visits, she'll have more continual support.  It's just all so awful.

I can't stop thinking about it.  You can't help but reflect on your own life and put yourself in their shoes.  He's so young.  He just turned 40 in September.  Every now and then a thought will pop into my head (like his poor 3 year old probably won't have any memory of her father) and I just start crying.  So definitely the worst news we could've gotten. 

I'll do a regular post tomorrow about Onederland and how it wasn't all it was cracked up to be but I don't have the energy right now.  Hope everyone is doing well in Blogland.  Being off work, I haven't had much time to check in and comment but I'm following as best I can.

Hope you all have a very Happy New Year!

Walking In A Winter...

Onederland!



Merry Christmas

I work a half day today and then it's time for the festivities.  I have all next week off to spend with my girls and I'm REALLY looking forward to that.  This is one of my favorite lines from the infamous "Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus" first published in The Sun in 1897.  You can read the entire article by clicking on the text.  It just makes me think that you haven't REALLY experienced Christmas until you can see it through the eyes of a child.  I enjoy Christmas so much more now that I have kids.  I've always liked Christmas but it's still so magical to my kids. 

You tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, Virginia, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.


No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.

For those who don't celebrate Christmas, I hope you have a wonderful weekend.  I hope you can appreciate the more secular side of the holiday...the tree, the lights, the whole idea of peace on earth and goodwill to men.

For believers, I hope we can keep in mind the true meaning of Christmas and appreciate the blessings in our lives.

For everyone - Just a reminder that with Christmas looming tomorrow, it's important to keep in mind that at this point we need to let go of the imperfections in ourselves and in others.  It doesn't matter if all the cookies didn't get baked, carols didn't get sung, cards didn't get mailed.  It's about the friends and family that we share this time with.  Appreciate all the wonderful people in your life who love you and support you all year long.  Also remember that no one is perfect.  Holidays can bring out the best...and the worst...in people.  Try to see past the flaws and get to know the person inside.  This includes the person who cuts you off to take the last parking space at the mall, the person with a cart full of groceries in the express lane and the crazy aunt who insists on explaining everything you're doing wrong with raising your children. 

Merry Christmas everybody!  I hope your holiday is as merry and bright as can be!

I leave you with pictures of my daughters with Santa.  He was at a local restaurant here in town when we went to lunch a few weeks ago.  We didn't know he'd be there so I took these with my phone which is why they're a little blurry and my kids aren't dressed as cute as they would've been otherwise.

P.S.  The girls loved the movie and my hubby said they sat and were quiet through the whole thing.  Glad it all went so well!

I've Been Inducted

First, thank you all for your thoughts and prayers.  Not much to update.  My brother-in-law is feeling much better as of last night.  I guess the pain has calmed to a dull ache as opposed to a constant throbbing.  He had another MRI yesterday to see if the swelling has gone down.  Seeing as he's in less pain, I would think it has but we haven't gotten the results yet.  If he can be relatively pain free over Christmas, we would be very grateful.

As for the title of this post, it happened.  I have officially been inducted to Bandland.  I had my first PB last night.  For anyone who might not know...PB stands for "productive burp," a horrible name for anything if I do say so myself.  They call it this instead of vomiting but it still sounds gross.  It's very difficult to explain to people who haven't experienced it what it's like and I won't attempt to do so here.  I will say this.  It was more... violent...than I thought it would be.  For some reason, I just imagined food just popping back out.  Not so much.  However, I was relieved that it didn't involve the same kind of retching or nastiness of actually throwing up.  The culprit?  I'm pretty sure corn on the cob and eating too fast.  At least that's all I can put together.  I've been struggling with the eating slower and chewing as well as I should and it finally came back to bite me.  If anything, with the way I've been eating, it at least let me know the band was, in fact, in there.  It also taught me that I REALLY don't want it to happen again.  I'm not a fool...I know I probably won't get through life with a lapband and only PB once but it's good to have goals.

The eating so far this week has been really good.  Portions are in control, not too many sweets and working harder to get my protein and fiber in.  All good things.  I'm finishing up my Christmas shopping today.  Time has just gotten away from me so I really gotta get this done. 

My hubby is taking my girls to the movies today.  What a brave soul he is!  They're going to see the new Yogi Bear movie.  Maddie (5) has been to only one other movie and we didn't take her to that until she  was 4.  She always had issues sitting still.  She did great though so I don't worry about her.  Lori (3), however, has never been to a movie and I'm worried about how she'll do.  She's still pretty little and has a lot of energy so I'm not sure that she'll sit still that long.  So not only is he attempting to take Lori to her first movie by himself but he's actually attempting to take BOTH girls by himself.  I wish him good luck on his adventure today. 

Brother In Law

Received some sad news yesterday.  My brother-in-law (my sister's husband) has a brain tumor.  He'd been suffering from headaches the last couple months and, thinking it was migraines, was given migraine medication in October.  This last headache started last week and had gotten progressively worse so his doctor worked him in yesterday.  He ordered an MRI immediately and they found the tumor.  It is operable and he'll have surgery a week from Wednesday.  His brain is swelling so he's been given steroids to address that issue but because of the steroids, they cannot give him any heavy duty pain killers so he's suffering, to say the least.  They let him go home and he's going to do all of the pre-surgery prep and steroid treatments outpatient so at least he'll be able to spend Christmas with my sister and their kids.  Unfortunately, they won't know if it's malignant or benign until they get in there and see what's what.  Right now we're just hoping the swelling goes down.  Please keep my sister and her family in your thoughts and send good vibes their way.

Weigh In 12/20/10

I'm at 200.0 lbs.  So I lost the pound I gained last week.  *SIGH*  Seems I've lost this same pound over and over the last few weeks.  The potlucks went well...from a socializing point of view.  If you read back to my "Shy" post, I wasn't exactly looking forward to these events but I wound up having a really good time.  The first potluck was Friday night with my husband's friends.  It was family friendly so we took the girls.  Lots of good food but not many sweets which was a welcome change of pace.  I ate just a little of everything but I drank my weight in wine.  Eek!  I laughed, I was charming (at least I thought so) and I had a very nice time.  The second potluck was with my husband's work people.  Obviously, I did not drink my weight in wine at that one but I did eat more because there was more room to sit down and less finger foods.  They had ham, lasagna, some Alfredo dish, brussel sprouts, etc.  Since it was more like a meal, I actually sat down and ate which is good and bad.  Bad in that I loaded more than I should have on to my plate but good that I didn't graze all night.  I did have two small slices of dessert though which I had avoided at the previous potluck.  All in all, I feel I did OK.  My girls loved going and it was nice to be able to put faces to the names that my hubby talks about all the time.  I also think I did OK in the whole "wife of a lawyer" thing.  I talked with them about a couple of current events without letting on that I'm a conservative (lawyers for the state are notoriously liberal) and let some of my more benign witticisms come out.  LOL.  Overall, I did alright and actually enjoyed myself.

Soccer went well.  @Amanda:  That's so funny that your daughter would just let them have the ball.  I'm sure my daughter would be the same way if we kept pursuing the sport.  She did better her last day than she had all season.  She really tried hard which was an improvement so I feel we finished strong.  She got a trophy for participating and a medal for perfect attendance.  Someday I'll write a post about how I feel about the whole "everybody gets a trophy" thing.  To put it short and sweet, at this age, I think it's great... but the competitive nature in me stops the warm and fuzzy feelings there.  It'll be nice to have Saturday mornings free for awhile.

Was tough coming back to work this morning.  My hubby and the kids have this week off so they were all snug in their beds when I left.  Made me want to crawl back into bed as well.  I have the week after Christmas off with the kids so I take comfort in the fact that my hubby will be feeling this way NEXT week.  LOL.  Hope all of you had a wonderful weekend and are winding down your Christmas shopping.  My hubby's gift has finally shipped and should be here tomorrow.  Keep your fingers crossed.  I still have to buy for my mom and dad.  I know what I'm getting them...it's just actually making it out to the stores to buy them that seems to be the problem.  I'll be trying to catch up on blogs this week but it may be tough as we have a lot of people out for the holiday so I'm backing them all up.  I'm leaving early Christmas Eve, however, come hell or high water.  Happy Monday!

Week In Review

Overall, I feel pretty good about the week.  Up until yesterday I didn't really feel like I overate.  Unfortunately, I've entered the land of potlucks. We had one at work yesterday, we're going to one tonight and we have one tomorrow.  Don't get me wrong.  I love potlucks.  You get an ecclectic mix of foods from lasagna to enchiladas, meatballs of every variety, 18 different kinds of chips with corresponding dips, 6 different kinds of humus with the pita bread of course.  Then there's the desserts... cakes, pies, streudels, cookies (Oh my!  The cookies alone - sugar, gingerbread, snickerdoodle, chocolate chip w/little andes mints in them...ah. The possibilities...).  Put all of these delectable confections in one room and it's where nutrition goes to die.  Don't get me wrong.  I certainly have done better than in years past but it was still ugly.  I still have such a hard time saying no to such goodies.  Honestly, if I can get through this week without gaining, I'll call it a success.

On the activity front.  PITIFUL.  I didn't go to the gym once this week.  The trip to the playground?  Delayed by unruly children, stomach bugs and an ear infection (all concerning 3 different people).  I just couldn't seem to get off my lazy bum to do much of anything this week. 

As far as the water goes - CHECK.  That's the only thing I've been good about.  At my work gift exchange, I received one of those Starbucks tumblers for cold drinks.  It's a 16 oz cup with the straw and everything...keeps water SUPER cold which is nice.  But I know if I drink 4 of them, I've hit my water goal each day and doing it this way has it made it surprisingly easy. 

Fast food?  CHECK.  No fast food for me this week.  I might have Subway on Sunday...I think it was Sunday but out of all the fast food places in the world, this one just isn't that bad.

So I'm 2 for 4 on what I wanted to be consistently doing every day.  This isn't acceptable by any means.  The most immediate threat are these potlucks...my goal?  Just not to gorge myself on everything in sight.  Make the best choice of the options and only eat ONCE.  Do SOMETHING active this weekend.  ANYTHING.  Doesn't matter what it is...just get out and DO something.  Then Monday...back to the gym.  I've got to get back to the freakin' gym.  I don't know why this has been so difficult.  I had gotten into such a good groove and actually was enjoying going and then POOF!  That motivation and drive has just dissipated into thin air.  Gotta get this back.  I know people who've lost weight having never been to the gym.  They walk, they run, they do exercise videos, they hike.  This is all well and good and I want to do all these things too.  However, obviously if left to my own devices, I won't do diddly.  I think I need a gym to stay on track...make the fitness a priority.  By actually having to GO, somehow I'm more likely to do it then if I have the option to "do it when I get home."  Then I get home and I see other things I should be doing and I get distracted.  Of course, right now...I haven't done anything at home OR at the gym so maybe it's all just excuses. 

My oldest has an ear infection.  Poor thing.  I can tell it's really hurting her...took her the doctor yesterday and she's now on antibiotics.  This is her fourth ear infection this year.  Doc said if they hit 6, they refer out to an ENT.  I'm hoping we don't have to go through all that.  She's 5...seems a little old for tubes or something.  My youngest has a doctor's appointment today for her 3 year check up.  She has to get a shot, of course.  Seems like until they're 4, they're always getting shots for something.  Regardless of how you feel about vaccinations (NOT a debate I'd like to get into), we can all agree that it sucks to get a shot.  My oldest has her last soccer game tomorrow morning.  Thank God!  I think I could handle a kid who just isn't good at sports but her general lack of concern over the ball that is actually rolling OVER her foot drives me absolutely crazy!  Already at age 5, she's more concerned with her hair and outfit than actually playing the game.  I don't think I see soccer in her future.  It was a nice noncompetitive way to introduce her to the game and it wasn't too expensive to find out she has no interest whatsoever in the sport.  Her sister, however, is gonna love it.  She's already pretty good at kicking the ball around.  I think we're going to sign my oldest up for swimming next.  She's a pretty good little swimmer.  She learned at age 2 and LOVES it.  And of course, she'd love to be able to swim in the winter.  So we'll see about that.

With that, I leave you with a Friday Funny...

Weigh In Day - Gain

And so this is Monday...

I'm at 201 today.  1 lb gain from last week.  I'm OK with this.  Not happy, mind you, but OK.  Why am I OK?  Because I know why this gain happened.  It's not like I was the model bandster last week.  After tracking my calories, I can see quite clearly why that gain occurred.  This is definitely less frustrating than when you're doing everything right and still see a gain on the scale.  So...got a plan for this week.  Still tracking and all that, but I made it to the grocery store and actually have my meals planned out a bit.  I also know that Wednesday isn't going to be an ideal day because I have the day off with my hubby and we're going to a movie and lunch.  Indian food so nothing too unhealthy there...just gotta watch the portion.  I'm going to account for that day though so hopefully I'll be under 200 by next Monday.

Weekend was good but way too short.  I did virtually nothing on Saturday.  Sunday, we did the grocery shopping and took the kids to the zoo.  The walk around the zoo was my activity for that day...2 hours of walking around pretty much continuously.  With the kids though, it certainly wasn't a brisk pace.  LOL.  Tomorrow I'm taking the girls to the neighborhood playground.  It's 2 miles round trip. I'm going to have them ride their bikes so I can go at a good clip.  I want to do this a couple times a week not only so I get my own activity in but also so they can be active once we get home. 

Not a whole lot going on otherwise.  Gearing up for the new week.  Hope it's a good one for all of you!

Tracking Day 4 - Thoughts on Shyness

Day 3: Calories - Check (even with the muffin)
           Activity - CHECK
           No Fast Food - Check
           Water - Check

Not a bad looking day, eh?  To answer Lori's question regarding what "ridiculous" calories were - I hit the 2000 mark - two meals out where I didn't make the best choices did me in.  I got on my treadmill at home last night.  Longest 30 minutes of my life.  For some reason, the treadmill on the gym doesn't bore me like my one at home.  We have a good one but I can't see the TV because the treadmill sits too high or my TV sits too low, depending on how you look at it.  But I did one of the preprogrammed workouts and it had me walking for 1.5 minutes and running for 30 seconds.  Wow.  I seriously can't run... but I did.  And I lived.  Will probably do this kind of interval training while I gear up for my next challenge which I will go into in a different post.

Today...I want to talk about shyness.  A blog I follow covered this in great detail on how this particular person overcame his shyness.  I think being overweight lends a different perspective to this though.  For instance, many of the bloggers I follow state how they became the "life of the party", "the funny one" or the "the people pleaser" to be accepted even though they're fat.  They felt the need to do this to compensate for what (whether they realize it or not) they perceived to be a negative trait about themselves.  Just as you have these people, there are people on the opposite side of the spectrum...the shy ones.  The socially anxious ones.  The "I'd rather die than walk into the middle of a party alone" ones.  These are the ones who were possibly humiliated by their weight (or possibly by some other event in their past - I know it's not all about the weight people) or felt they were being judged or wouldn't be accepted by others.

So where do I fall in this spectrum?  Smack dab in the middle.  To a certain extent, I think I have somewhat of a split personality disorder.  At work, I am outgoing and confident.  I'll speak to everyone at a meeting or work gathering whether I know them or not.  Socially, I'd rather crawl under a rock than talk to people I don't know.  Once I get to know someone, I'm funny and outspoken...my opinion rarely goes unstated.  But I feel that when I first meet people, my true personality doesn't come through at all.  I'm rather reserved, maybe a small joke here or there, but overall I don't say much at all and let the conversation really take place amongst others.  My hubby is the exact opposite of me.  He's the loud one, the gregarious one, the hilarious one and the one everyone likes to talk to and he can talk to just about anyone about almost anything.  We make quite the pair.  It's amazing we ever hooked up in the first place.  It probably helped that we met at work where Personality A shows up.  Why is there a discrepancy between work and home?  The only answer I can conjure is that most of the conversations at work revolve around, well, WORK.  I'm VERY competent at what I do, I know our processes end to end and am considered a subject matter expert regarding everything our department does.  I can't help but feel confident in that situation because no matter what they ask me, I know the answer or can find the answer or can BS a suitable answer.

OK...so enough rambling about my issue.  The question is why am I shy in my personal life?  I've always been kinda shy...clung to my mother at birthday parties when I was younger and that sort of thing so maybe it's something too engrained to change.  I know I've always wanted nothing more to be accepted and be part of the "in" group and I know I've never felt like I was.  I know I don't like people looking at me but I can't really say if this is a relatively new phenomenon.  Will this change when I lose weight?  I'm worried I'll say something stupid or make a joke that offends somebody.  But seriously, I wasn't raised in a barn so is this something I should be overly concerned with?  My shyness doesn't keep me from going out, doesn't keep me from meeting new people or going out with my hubby.  So is this something to even be concerned about?  I say yes.  I say this because every time I know we're going out with someone new, I get nervous and don't have as good a time as I'd like.  I say this because I'm not particularly friendly with the neighbors and it's good to know your neighbors.  I say this because this is how you meet people and everyone could use more friends!  I lived in Ohio very briefly a few years back and we had all kinds of couples we hung out with and did things with.  We moved back to AZ (grew up here) and we've yet to find even one couple that we can routinely hang out with.  I think part of this is due to my shyness issue.

So my dear blogging friends, it's time this girly break out of her shell.  The question is how do I do this.  Well, for starters, I'm going to smile, make eye contact and say hello to at least 2 people I don't know every day.  I'm going to make idle chit chat with random people...the clerk at the grocery store, the teller at the bank, the Starbucks lady (on the rare occasion when I treat myself...ahem) to get used to talking to people.  I'm also going to try some positive reinforcement.  Remind myself before we go somewhere I'll be uncomfortable that I'm worth getting to know, I'm not going to say something stupid and I have something to contribute to the conversation.  I'm going to convince myself I'm not shy anymore and then maybe eventually, I'll start to believe it.  The first test is next week...my hubby's office Christmas party.  We skipped last year's (one guess why) so we're going this year.  I'm going to make nice and be charming...even if it kills me.  I leave you with a Friday Funny:

Tracking Update - Day 3

Hoo Doggy!  I can take in a ridiculous amount of calories.  Thought I had been doing so well.

Day 1 - Calories - Check
             Water - Check
              Activity - No Check
              No Fast Food - Check

Day 2 - Calories - No Check - Holy calorie balls Batman!  I went a little nuts yesterday.  WAY overshot my calorie goal and it wasn't pretty.
             Water - Check
             Activity - No Check - really?
             No Fast Food - Check

Day 3 - Calories - MUCH better than yesterday but still unacceptable.  Darn people who offer you free muffins.  Like I need muffins!  I know, I know.  No one was holding a gun to my heading FORCING me to eat the muffin.  Must work on saying NO.
             Water - Halfway there
             Activity - Not yet - will definitely do this after work today.  Thinking the treadmill at home
             No Fast Food - Check

So there you have it.  I couldn't even go 3 days without seriously going off plan.  But in a BIG way, I stayed on plan by logging what I ate.  I owned up to it.  I didn't hide it.  I didn't pretend it didn't happen.  So that, in itself, is a small victory.  The real victory will come with the changes I make.  I'm a work in progress....and I think the progress is moving right along.

REFOCUS

It seems that a lot of people out in weight loss blogland are having a hard time keeping their eye on the prize during the silliness of the holiday season.  I am no exception.  I think it's easy to get caught up in the holiday fervor of peppermint bark, eggnog, gingerbread cookies and chocolate covered cherries (mmmmmmmm....cherries).  I am supposed to have an appointment with my doc next week.  Honestly, I don't think he'd give me a fill because he was hesitant to give me one last month (not really sure why).  I've also got some insurance hoops to deal with and I don't see them getting resolved by next week.  All this just to say, I probably won't be seeing my doc for fill until mid January or so.  So until then, I need to work my band just as it is and stick to the plan.  I'm not starving between meals or anything, it's more the choices I'm making.  So...the word of the month is REFOCUS.

I've been thinking of a plan to get back on track.  So to help me REFOCUS in December:

1. Do at least 30 minutes of activity 4 times a week.  This isn't specific to the gym because it's just tough getting there sometimes.  I think the 4 hours of putting up Christmas lights and going up and down the ladder (my thighs and glutes are seriously sore) count.  My oldest has been begging to get the training wheels off her bike.  All this counts.
2. Going back to lifestyle change #2 - no more fast food!  Yes...I had fallen back into this nasty habit.  Well, no more.
3. Drink at least 64 oz. of water EVERY DAY.  No exception.  Chug it if I have to but that water is going down.
4. Log my food.  I hate doing this.  I'll be honest.  I hate any program that makes me track my food.  However, given this is the season of special treats, I'm going to do this for the month of December.  This will not only allow me to see how my normal intake is adding up but also allows me to see when I can afford to partake is those special treats.  Call it "planned veering" if you will.

So there you have it.  That is my plan to REFOCUS in December.  It's only December 7th so I'm not way late on starting this.  You'll notice that none of these items are based on a weight loss goal.  I've decided that setting a time frame for a certain number of lbs to come flying off my body isn't motivating for me.  Just makes me feel like a loser if I don't hit it.  Instead, I've chosen action items.  Things I can mark off my list each day.  I truly believe if I do these 4 things every day, the lbs will come off on their own without my telling them to.  So, for those of you struggling... How do you plan to REFOCUS?

Weigh In and House Pics

Good morning and Happy Monday to one and all!  Today is Weigh Day and no, I haven't hit Onederland.  I am sitting on exactly 200.0 lbs.  I'm OK with this because it's still a 1.5 lb loss from last week so the scale is still heading the right direction so I'll take what I can get.  Hoping I can post that Onederland post next Monday. 

In a better place today than I was last week.  First, my mother called and apologized.  While it didn't make me feel as better as I thought it would right away...I'm definitely feeling better about the whole situation at this point. 

I also took on Linda's challenge.  I spent the weekend decorating my house for Christmas.  Even my hubby helped and he usually doesn't.  The whole family got involved (which is why most of the ornaments are towards the bottom of the tree. LOL) and the girls are really excited about Christmas now.  The yard isn't quite done.  I have an inflatable Santa, some more yard stake type items and a sign on their way so then I'll be officially done.  What kind of fun did everyone else participate in this weekend?

Here are some pics.  Enjoy!  And have a fabulous week!


There are bushes to the left that have lights too but a
neighborhood cat keeps unplugging them!



That's our Charlie Brown Christmas Tree next to a very small, cheap
nativity.  I'd love to buy a better one but finances haven't permitted yet.  Both
to remind me of the true meaning of Christmas

The smaller stockings that are attached to the girls' are for their
 "babies" (their favorite stuffed animals)

Case of the Fridays?

We've all heard the Office Space classic line "Looks like somebody's got a case of Mondays."  Well, I apparently have a case of the Fridays.  I'd love to tell you that it means I'm in a great mood - perky and ready to take on the world.  But I'm just...not.

Nothing horrible has happened.  There are some of us in Blogland going through some really serious stuff...illnesses, loss of loved ones, etc.  I'm not going through any of that so that may make this post seem kinda whiny but oh well...here we go - bullet style.

• I was supposed to go back to the gym on Monday.  I had given myself a couple weeks off after my walk to recuperate and get geared up for more working out.  It is now Friday and I haven't been to the gym all week.  Such a lazy %*@!  Blah!
• My family issues STILL have not been resolved.  I'm so sad about this.  I won't go into all the details but my parents still believe they've done nothing wrong.  Even if they think this, you'd think they could apologize without actually owning up to a mistake...say something like "We're sorry we upset you...we didn't think you'd get that worked up," or something like that.  But NO.  And they're so freakin' stubborn.  The problem is until they own up to the fact that maybe what they did wasn't the best idea, I can't possibly begin to forgive them.  It's the holidays for goodness sake!  A time to put things behind you and be with family and friends but I can't because they screwed me over too close to Christmas!  Blah!
• Work still sucks.  I like my job and it's a decent job.  I know in this economy I should just feel lucky I have one.  But I feel like they pile a lot of work on me while my partner doesn't take on nearly the same amount of responsibility and I feel I am not adequately rewarded for it.  I don't need a lot of recognition or pats on the back but come raise/bonus time, I feel I should be acknowledged with a heftier paycheck.  The company I work for, however, is very cheap and know they can take advantage of its workers because we're all in a constant state of fear of our jobs being outsourced. They don't have to pay us well because they know we're not going anywhere.  Blah!
• I'm so tired of not having any money.  I admit I'm not a great saver and my hubby and I accumulated a lot of debt over the years.  But we have been living off nothing but cash for a long time now and we just can't seem to get ahead.  So tired of living paycheck to paycheck.  Anything goes wrong?  We're screwed.  Blah!
• I'm ready to leave AZ.  I'm tired of not having seasons.  I want to move somewhere where leaves actually change colors and you need a coat in the winter and it's not 75 freakin' degrees at Christmas!  I know tons of people love this about AZ but I'm just tired of it. This summer really just got to me...it was just too hot for too long and I've had it.  Not to mention the fact that Phoenix has just gotten too big for my tastes.  I'm a smaller town girl...I'd like to actually meet my neighbors and maybe have some couple friends to hang out with.  Is that so much to ask for????  Blah!
• I suck at goal setting.  I can't seem to set a goal for myself.  I don't know what's wrong with me.  I've been pondering what I want December to look like and I just can't bring myself to make any decisions.  Blah!

OK.  So enough complaining.  What am I going to do about these things?  Well, the money situation and the living situation is just what it is.  I can't do much to change that right now.  The gym and the goals...that I can do something about.  My very first goal is to get back to the gym on Monday.  Period.  No ifs, ands or buts about it.  Once I've reached that goal...I'm expanding it to going to the gym at least 3 days a week and trying a Zumba class before the end of the year.  There.  Goals...check.  My other goal right now is to pull myself out of this funk and enjoy the holiday season.  In that spirit, I'm accepting Linda's challenge at Linda's Bandwidth.  She challenged us to find the holiday spirit and take pictures this weekend of whatever gets us in the mood.  So I'm decorating my house this weekend, gonna watch a little Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer with my girls and drink some calorie-laden eggnog.  I'll post pictures on Monday.  I encourage anyone feeling in a rut right now to find something to do this weekend that will lift your spirits - holiday related or not.  Just do something you know will make you smile.  Go for a walk, go to the zoo, visit with friends, play a card game, read a book - anything.  Just do it for you and do it for your spirit.  You'll feel better, I promise.  With that, I leave you with a Friday Funny:

Weekend Pics

As promised...here are pictures of my youngest daughter's birthday party, one of me at Thanksgiving and random pics from the fun we had over the weekend.



Isn't that look devilish?





Yes I made the cake myself...was very proud of that...Lori loved it!




First Big Girl bike with training wheels...look at her go!





Me at Thanksgiving - I actually don't mind this picture too much



To protect the innocent..the girls with my brother in law





Things are going OK.  Work kinda sucks...the family issues are still around and I'm just feeling kinda "blah."  Hoping getting my Christmas decorations and stuff up this weekend will help with my mood.  I love it when my house is all decorated for the holidays.  So there you have it.  Special shout out to Amanda who just got her insurance approval and is scheduled for surgery Dec 13th!  If you haven't checked her out yet, please go see her here.  Happy Hump Day to one and all!

Holding Steady

Weigh In Day - 201.5.  Exactly the same as last week.  I'm not surprised by this.  With Thanksgiving and my daughter's birthday, there were a lot of treats around and I know I ate more than my fair share of all of them.  There was also a lot of family drama over the weekend so fought the need to eat my feelings.  A lot of the family stuff is done but some is still lingering and I'm not quite sure how I'm going to handle it.  My daughter's birthday party was lovely though.  She was really excited about the extended family being in town for it and she loved her new "big girl" bike.  She took to it like a champ.  Will make sure to post pictures tomorrow.  Hope everyone had a great holiday and is geared up for the new week.  I'm absolutely exhausted but hoping as things get back to normal, I'll re-energize.  Happy Cyber Monday to all!

Stuffed? Not Very.

Well, post Thanksgiving lethargy has kicked in.  How did I do?  Not too bad actually.  I ate half a plate of food ( a little bit of everything) and indulged in 2 slices of pie.  That was it.  Too much?  Yes.  Way less than years past?  Definitely.  I also did not take part in the second Thanksgiving dinner that always seems to occur at about 7:00 pm when people start getting snacky again.  I'm very proud of that.  So overall, I think I did pretty good.  It's definitely an improvement and to be honest, I'm not worried about holidays.  I think if I make good choices 85% of the time, I'll be in good shape. 

Dinner went off without a hitch which is great.  Hardly any leftovers which is even better.  The day was full of family and laughter which is really all it's about for me.

So I have to work today which sucks.  It's not a matter of boredom really.  I have plenty of work to do and enough to keep me busy until I go home.  It's that it's so darn quiet in here.  Far too few people for my tastes and when it's quiet, the day drags on forever.  My hubby is off which doesn't help matters because I much rather be home with him and my rugrats than sitting in this cube wasting away like a veal, doing trivial data analysis. 

I have also slacked the last two weeks on exercise.  Recovering from the walk and just generally needing a break from it.  Back to the grind on Monday...going back to my gym and step classes.  Actually pretty excited about it.

So there you have it.  Nothing too exciting at this point.  My daughter's 3rd birthday is this Sunday so will hopefully post pics on Monday.  Enjoy your (long, for some) weekend everybody!  I leave you with a funny...

Thankful for NSV's!

So everyone is starting to get their Thanksgiving posts up and I figured since I'll be busy with preparations tomorrow...best to get this post out today.

First...I'm thankful for NSV's.  When the scale isn't moving, they keep us motivated but aside from that, aren't the Non Scale Victories really what this whole weight loss business is all about.  I know we obsess over numbers - onederland, BMI, Vanity Sizing, How fast we run a mile, etc.  But didn't we all do this for other reasons and even once we hit a milestone number, aren't we more grateful for what that number really represents?  For some, it's not needing that extender on the airplane, being able to fit in booths at restaurants or finally being able to ride roller coasters again.  For others, it's being able to walk 60 miles in 3 days without dying or being able to play with your kids and not be out of breath or finally feeling sexy again for your spouse.  It's these things that those of us who are losing weight are really longing for right?  So in the spirit of being grateful for these things, I had 4 NSV's this week that I thought I would share.

1. Some long time followers may remember this post.  My hubby bought me a bracelet last year for Christmas and I was frustrated because it barely fit around my wrist.  I wore this bracelet two weeks ago and it moves up and down my arm now.  Fits like a dream and it's beautiful
2. In that same post, I had bought a pair of Tinkerbell jammies, got home and found they didn't fit.  So sick of that happening.  I put these on last week and while they didn't look great...they fit.  I even used the pants for camping during my big walk.
3. Yesterday morning, I was walking into work and I held the door open for the person behind me.  Turns out she's a colleague who sits just kitty cornered behind me.  She kinda gasped and said "Good morning! I didn't recognize it was you."  I'm taking that to mean my butt didn't look as big...whether she meant it that way or not.  I'm taking it.
4. I have a white button down blouse that I stopped wearing last year because it was just too tight.  The buttons at the chest wanted to pop out and the shoulders looked like sausages stuffed into it.  I wore this shirt yesterday with room to spare.

While these are all good things...albeit small, they're not what I'm truly grateful for.  I'm grateful for husband, without whom I never could've done that walk or gotten the band or felt any amount of confidence in anything at all.  I'm grateful for my children.  Despite being royal pains some of the time, they're really good kids and they make my world go around.  I'm grateful for my family...despite not being the most supportive bunch, they have their moments...like when my sister walked the first five miles of the walk with me in spirit 9 states away.  I'm grateful I have a job in this turbulent economy and that we can feed our kids and put gas in the car and not worry about where we're going to sleep at night.  I'm grateful for this blogging community that allows me to vent, cry, laugh and get support 24/7. 

So...remember what Thanksgiving is all about.  While it is an American holiday, I encourage all those blogsters from around the world to take a minute and reflect on what you're thankful for on Thursday.  Not a bad practice to get into...

100...

Followers, that is.  Wahoo!  I couldn't imagine 5 people who would listen to me babble on about weight loss efforts in "real life" much less 100 in the virtual world.  Thanks to each and every one of you for tagging along on my journey and lending much needed support.  Y'all rock!

Overall, it was a productive weekend.  My hubby and I got the house ready for Turkey Day.  This included vacuuming and shampooing the carpet, cleaning the upholstery, scrubbing down the kitchen, cleaning out the pantry and grocery shopping.  I have Wednesday off in order to prepare more so it should all go off without a hitch.  Makes the weekend go by too quickly though.  Back at work today and not uberexcited about it.

I am now down to 201.5.  That's only a half pound down from last week but I think I know what's contributing to the slow loss so I'm OK with it.  Time of the month has come and is lingering so I'm sure that's not helping.  What makes that even weirder is that I'm on birth control and this isn't when it was supposed to come.  Will have to talk to the doc about this at my annual appointment.  I've been sick ever since my walk (and a little before actually) so I know my body is holding on to whatever fluid it can get.  So this week is all about hydrating and getting better.  My cold has moved into my ears and now I can't hear out of one of them and my throat is killing me.  I'm considering seeing a doctor but I don't think there's much he can do.  Unfortunately, I'm not one of those people that just can't seem to muster the energy to eat when I'm sick.  I crave comfort food so part of the challenge has been resisting the urge to "feed a cold."  Isn't that how it goes?  "Feed a cold.  Starve a fever."  Ugh.  Can't wait to feel better.  Seriously sick of being sick. 

So as I was saying...that puts me at 1.6 lbs from Onederland.  I can't wait to see that 199 on the scale but I'll be patient.  It's been 3 months since surgery and I've lost almost 28 lbs.  Couldn't be happier with these results.  That second fill has had some effect.  I'm having a harder time with certain breads and I can certainly eat less.  My next appointment is December 9th which I may push back due to insurance reasons.  We'll see.  Hope all of you had a fantastic weekend and enjoy your holiday week here in the U.S!

I Did It! And Lived To Talk About It

Happy Thursday to one and all!  I apologize for not posting sooner.  Came back to a crazy time at work. 

I survived the 3 Day!  It was an amazing experience...grueling...touching...painful...cold...all rolled into one extraordinary weekend.  Opening ceremonies on Friday morning got the ball rolling.  Susan G Komen is really into the symbolism and try their hardest to get everyone crying at one of their events.  They raised a flag that was a row of white ribbons with the names of people the walkers had lost to breast cancer.  My aunt was on the ribbon as well as my teammate's (and BFF) mother.  It was nice that we could honor them like that.  My friend kicked this walk's butt!  She was the 177th walker to cross the finish line Sunday afternoon and that's including the ones who had to the catch the bus to the finish line earlier in the day.  I was not given a number.  LOL.  I earned myself a little nickname while on the walk.  I had no less than 6 people call me "The Tortoise" from The Tortoise and the Hare.  Honestly, my pace was pretty slow but I didn't linger long at pit stops or lunch so the same people would pass me 3 or 4 times a day.  With my pink hair, they'd remember me and wonder how I got ahead of them.  I wear this nickname like a badge of honor.  No hurt feelings here. 



Isn't he hot?  Part of the "Pink Army" - one of the crew teams




Day 2




My BFF




Pit Stop 1

 Camp was pretty good.  Showers were better than expected and the place was fairly organized.  We never had to wait for food or to refill our water bottles.  It was, however, very COLD.  This is Arizona...I'm not used to cold.  It got down to about 40 degrees Friday night.   Meanwhile, I'm in this little 2 person tent with a sleeping back that supposedly only good down to 45 degrees.  Froze my butt off.  Needless to say, my friend nor I got a very good night's sleep that night.  It was so cold, she decided to not camp the second night (as did the people in the 5 tents surrounding us).  Wusses!  So the second night, the camp gave out Mylar blankets (they look like tin foil and are given to people in emergency situations to prevent hypothermia...go figure).  My friend gave me her spare blanket since I refused to use her guestroom and the lady across the way who opted for a hotel left her sleeping bag in our tent while we were at dinner.  Needless to say that between all that and the 2 pairs of pants I wore to bed that night, I was nice and toasty. 



Stuff to keep me warm


The one thing that really touched my heart was the outpouring of support from the community and crew.  The volunteer crew that works this event are quite possibly the best people. ever.  They keep you going and aside from lying to you about how far away your next pit stop is, they're really pretty helpful.  I was taken back by the number of cars that honked in support of us as we walked along big streets and people who gave us thumbs up on their way to work.  The people who came out to the cheering stations were probably the coolest people ever.  I guess it just really drove the idea home of what we were doing.  I knew I was raising money for a good cause and knew I was bringing awareness to the cause by walking this but I didn't realize how genuinely GRATEFUL people were for what we were doing out there.  I really feel like we touched these people's lives in some way and I don't even know them and they don't know me but they appreciate my effort anyway.  It's hard to put into words how that feels.

The whole weekend was probably one of the most memorable events of my life.  I'm so glad I did it.  I'm proud of my efforts.  And while I was sore for a few days after (feeling much better now, thank you), it was totally worth it.  Am I one of those people that will go back and do this walk year after year?  Probably not.  I don't think I want to do the walk again.  However, I think I'd like to stay involved and possibly be part of that amazing crew or cheering station each year.  I highly recommend it to anyone who is considering doing the 3 Day.  You won't regret it.




My poor sick baby at closing ceremonies




Can you feel the excitement?




The "No More Cancer" Flag at closing ceremonies


In other news, I got my second fill on Monday.  At first, Doc didn't want to give me one because I lost 7.5 lbs since my last appointment and he was all happy with that.  "Don't fix it if it ain't broke."  I explained to him that it's impossible to walk 60 miles in 3 days just before an appointment and not lose weight.  He gave me my fill.  Not a big difference so far but I can definitely feel it's there.  Anything else?  I'm sick...again.  My youngest daughter gave me her cold again.  It was either that  or that whole camping in 40 degree weather without proper equipment thing.  I host Thanksgiving at my house so will be getting my house in order this weekend.  I also have my youngest daughter's birthday party the weekend after Thanksgiving so a busy couple weeks here.

Hope everyone is having a fantastic week!  I'll get caught up and start commenting again soon.

3 Day Starts Tomorrow

It's finally here.  I registered for this walk back in January.  Seemed like a good idea at the time.  Motivation to work out and get in shape, banded or not.  I'm lucky enough to have a friend crazy enough to sign up with me.  60 miles in 3 days.  I'll do my best to post once while I'm "at camp" but I'm not sure how feasible that will be.  Just one thought right now...

What the hell did I get myself into?

If you don't hear from me by Tuesday (I'm taking Monday off to recuperate), check the AZ news for a woman with pink hair being carted away in an ambulance.

I'm off to walk...a lot.

Pink Hair & Goals

Good morning all!  Thank you so much for all the comments on my last weigh in.  I've gotten the question "What size are you in?" a couple times now so I guess it's time to fess up.  Honestly, I'm in the same size I have been in for the last 2 years with minor modifications.  I'm still in an 18.  Truth be told, once I hit a certain weight I loathed shopping (I know many of you can relate).  I hated going to normal stores, unable to find ANYTHING and I loathed the options at the Fattie stores like Lane Bryant.  I've never looked good in florals regardless of what Laney thought.  So I stopped shopping unless I really had to.  That being said, I think most of my current 18's are pretty stretched out so they're closer to a 20/22.  Now, are my clothes fitting better?  Yes and No.  Some of my "smaller" 18's (women know what I'm talking about here) fit MUCH better and look nicer (see previous post about my old new shirt).  My "bigger" 18's are looking baggy and a little sloppy.  My 18W jeans are literally falling off me but I'm holding out until January to buy new ones because that's when stuff goes on sale.  OK so enough about my nonprogress on the clothes front.

Ask and ye shall receive...the PINK hair.  (disclaimer: I had no photographer so I took them myself so the angles are a little off.  Incidentally I have VERY short arms.  LOL)

I'm kinda digging the pink hair.  Very Kat Von D of me (anyone watch LA Ink?).  Anyhoo... I've been thinking a lot about goals lately.  I thought about joining the Holiday Challenge but I chickened out.  I know what my "I would be so stoked to be at this weight" goal is and I know what my "OMG! Can you believe I'm this freakin' skinny goal" is.  But I'm having a hard time picking milestones.  25 was a big one for me because it's been YEARS since I've lost more than 20 lbs.  The main issue I'm having is with deadlines.  I don't really like using the word "deadline" in relation to the weight loss because even if you don't hit your goal by a certain date doesn't mean that you're done and the task is over.  I guess what I'm trying to think of is what weight should I shoot for by, say, New Year's or my girls' cruise in January.  Truth is I have no idea.  The surgeon's office throws out that you should lose between 1-2 lbs a week. Hmmmmmkay.  At 2 lbs, that would put me at about 14 lbs by New Year's.  But it's the holidays and let's be perfectly honest, I've never not GAINED weight on the holidays much less lost it.  But I don't want to take a pass at losing weight during the holidays so I'm thinking maybe between 10-12 lbs by New Year's.  I don't know.  That sounds wishy washy.  Then I think, do I have to set mini goals?  Isn't every pound toward my ultimate goal an achievement?  As long as I'm making better choices and decisions and being more active each day attaining a goal in and of itself?  Patrick had an interesting goal setting post awhile back and basically it questions the validity of making goals.  How useful is it?  I think the general consensus (while there was definitely debate) was that setting goals is helpful as long as you actually work towards them.  Well, that was kinda the "duh" answer but I start thinking if I keep my eye on the big goal, then maybe it's not necessary to set little ones since I already know where I want to go.  I realize I'm babbling about this but hang with me for just one more thing.  I've also been thinking that maybe I'm better off thinking in terms of challenges.  This year's health challenge was to get banded (check!) and complete the Susan G Komen 3 Day for the Cure (almost there!).  Training for the walk has jump started my weight loss and has made me a little more fit.  So I'm thinking if I give myself another challenge for next year then perhaps that will be motivation enough. 

OK...I know I've rambled on and I appreciate you sticking with me.  To reward you for your efforts, I leave you with a joke...

Two boys, ages 8 & 10, were always getting into trouble. Their mother heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with the boys. The clergyman agreed, but asked to see them individually. So the mother sent her 8 year old to see him the following
morning, intending to send the older boy in the afternoon. The clergyman, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the younger boy down and sternly asked,“Where is God?” The boy’s mouth dropped open, but he made no response. The clergyman repeated the question in a even sterner tone,“Where is God?” When the boy made no attempt to answer, the clergyman got to his feet and bellowed,“WHERE IS GOD?” The boy screamed and bolted from the room. When his older brother found him hiding in his closet, he asked,“What happened?” The younger brother, gasping for breath replied,“We’re in BIG TROUBLE this time, dude. God is missing–and they think we did it!”

 

25!

25 lbs gone!!  I weighed in this morning at 203.5.  That is a 2.5 lb losss from last week and 25.5 lbs overall.  I am one very excited girl this morning.  Only 4 days until my big walk.  Starting to get pretty nervous about it.  I did dye my hair pink over the weekend so will post a picture of that tomorrow, hopefully.  My girls don't quite know what to make of it but I'll only have it for a couple weeks so not a biggie.  Now, in true bandster style, I will show you what 25 lbs looks like by way of sealife.  Have a great Monday!

Are Styrofoam Cups the Devil?

**********WARNING**************

This post is has nothing to do with weight loss and isn't all that positive...but I need to vent so that's that.

Alrighty...we'll start with the title.  Let me preface this by saying that I'm all for taking care of the environment.  I understand we only have one Earth and so we must protect it.  I recycle, I reuse plastic bags, I turn lights off when I leave the room and I turn the water off while I brush my teeth.  That being said, in an effort to "go green" (anyone else entirely sick of that phrase?) my office has decided to do away with Styrofoam cups.  I don't have an issue with this if they replaced them with paper cups, reusable cups or something else equally recyclable.  Nope.  Nothing.  They took the cups and that was it.  We had a "Bring Your Favorite Mug Day" and they called it good.  Now...I always use my own coffee mug because it's just beyond cute.  However, I prefer using their cups for random cups of hot chocolate or water.  We have a water/ice machine that has pretty good water so I would use the cups for that...easy to count and measure and ice won't fit in my water bottle.  After the initial annoyance of the mere fact that they took away the cups wore off, I now have to deal with the unintended consequences of this action.  The kitchenette has 3 refrigerators, a 3 pot coffee maker and the needed accessories (sweeteners, stirrers, etc.), 3 microwaves and 1 sink.  This is supposed to accommodate over 250 people.  Yes...1 sink.  If you're using a cup for all your coffee, tea, water, soda, etc...you're going to have to rinse out your cup.  So there's a backlog of people in there ALL THE TIME waiting to use the sink...causing people to not be able to open refrigerators to get lunches, causing a backup at the microwaves...it's chaos I tell you!  On top of all this, they have no dish soap.  They have hand soap which is what people are using to clean their dishes.  Now I don't claim to be a soap expert but why make hand soap and dish soap separate things if they're not meant to be used as such???  Disgusting!  We all know that the real reason they've done away with the cups has nothing to do with "going green" but with the costs.  In the little flyer they gave us talking about how many cups are thrown out each year, they just happen to mention how much it costs our site to purchase said cups for a year.  Anything to save a buck.  So that's my Styrofoam vent for the day.

Still going with blasting my office for stuff.  They did a "reduction in force" yesterday.  For anyone who hasn't worked in the corporate world, it means they fired people.  They're "job eliminations" and they're making getting the severance pay difficult.  First off, you'd think with all the money they're saving on Styrofoam cups, they could afford to keep a few of these jobs.  But I digress...luckily, my job has been spared.  I work for a bank (not a branch) and overall it's a good bank.  If someone were looking for financial services, I wouldn't hesitate to recommend my company to anyone.  But sometimes it feels like I work for the devil.  So many of our jobs have been shipped overseas since I started working here.  I know eventually they'll send me to Manila or Mumbai to train my replacement.  I'm prepared for it and know I'll land on my feet one way or another but it's so frustrating.  They talk about how consumers aren't spending right now and how that's affecting our bottom line but what they don't see is how they exacerbate the problem.  Banks have owned up to (didn't have much choice) the role they played in the housing market bubble bursting and the hedge fund issues but this is something no one is crucifying them for but should be.  You lay off hundreds of people every year and send those jobs offshore.  Then you wonder why these same people aren't spending money???  Who do you think your customers are???  Then of course, when raise time comes around and we get something (if we're lucky) that doesn't even cover the rate of inflation, I'm told to just "feel grateful I have a job."  Yeah...working for the devil.

Since we're talking about things that bug me today...politics.  Now I'm involved in politics as much as anybody else.  I keep up with the issues and I vote in every election.  That being said, this year just absolutely killed politics for me.  What's sad is that it wasn't the politicians that did it.  It was the people.  The left wing/right wing...can't have a conversation without them blaming the other party for something...can't have a conversation without it turning into a political debate...can't have a political debate without it being reduced to childish name calling and irrational arguments...people.  I'm all for debate...it's how ideas are exchanged.  And you can debate with someone whom you know you're not going to convince them of anything and still enjoy it and be productive.  But not this year.  Everyone is so polarized and out to get the other people.  It's really quite sad that it's all come down to this.  Democrats are "heartbroken" by the results and republicans are smug about their "win" (getting the feeling I'm an Independent?).  Give me a break.  They act as if there's some HUGE difference in political parties.  Politicians are politicians.  They are in it for themselves...not US...and anyone who honestly believes that one party is truly representing the needs/wants of the country as a whole over another party is just naive.  Now I could go off on a tirade about how this is always going to happen as long as we have a two party system and how until you elect a true MODERATE into office, you're going to have these same issues.  But I won't.  I won't because I am sick to death of politics and all the word implies.  Nuff said.

I think that's all the griping I'm doing today.  I had my first parent/teacher conference ever for my oldest daughter.  Academically, she's doing fantastic.  Too smart for her own good.  They tested her for an advanced reading group and while she's not quite ready for that, they are going to make sure she's challenged a little bit more in her current reading group.  She loves to write letters and is one of the best writers in her class (kindergarten so we're talking being able to tell what the letters ARE. LOL) and she's excelling at Math and numbers problems.  All good stuff.  Then the teacher mentioned that normally Maddie is bubbly and happy and is one of her easiest students but in the past week or two, she's become a bit of a handful and is showing some attitude.  Since it was such a drastic change for her, the teacher wanted to bring it up to see if we could provide some insight into what might be wrong or if something happened at home.  We told the teacher we had noticed it too but couldn't pinpoint anything that's happened that would cause a shift in attitude.  This has me a little concerned but her teacher said if there hasn't been any big changes, then it's probably just a phase.  I hope so. 

Weekend should be pretty laid back.  Taking this weekend off as far as walks go in order to rest up a bit for the big event.  I gotta get all my packing stuff in order.  Sunday, I'm dying my hair pink.  That's right...PINK.  Not my whole head...just putting some chunks of pink in but it's going to be freakin' awesome.  I checked with my boss and there's nothing in the dress code against it so I won't get in trouble...good thing.  I'll only have the pink in for a couple weeks...just over the walk and a little while after until I get around to taking it out.  I'm pretty excited about it!  I'm also going to try to get some housework done this weekend.  November is a busy, busy month this year with the 3 Day, Thanksgiving (I host) and my youngest daughter's birthday the weekend after Thanksgiving.  Lots to do, lots to clean and lots to cook.  Still haven't hopped on the scale.  I don't think I will until Monday.  I have my next fill appointment November 15th...the day after my walk.  I was thinking about rescheduling it because it'd be nice to not have to do liquids that day.  But then I thought...nope.  This is what lifestyle changes are all about.  Stick to your schedule.  So I am.  Thinking I may go see a movie that day.  Anyhoo...that's all I got today.  Hope y'all have a fantastic weekend!  I'll leave you with this (a Family Guy reference of all things meaning "What bugs you?"): 

What grinds your gears?