Monday, August 31, 2015

Day 54 Weigh In

PreOp Diet Weigh In: 226
Surgery Day Weigh In: 218.5
Day 54Weigh In: 203.5
Change Since Last Week: -1.5

Better.  Much Better.  I know what did me in this time and it was the weekend.  We hung out with the neighbors.  There's a couple across the street who are very much like Hubby and me in personality so the party moved to our place and we drank WAY TOO MUCH once they got here.  I also had Chinese on Sunday which brought the Sodium level a bit high.  I am NOT complaining about this loss.  I just know it COULD'VE been better.  I'm also not beating myself up.  I don't have many friends here in Florida...any friends it was nice to let loose with some folks and open up a bit.  I just need to learn how to do it without as much booze.  Foodwise, the gathering was alright.  From start to finish, it was about 7 hours and I had 1 wing, 1 small sloppy joe w/bun and 1 spring roll.  Not terrible.

In speaking with another neighbor..Jen & Jeremy, I realized that I was a little judgey.  Jen&Jeremy (and yes you almost HAVE to say their names together) are crossfit people.  Serious crossfit people.  Jen&Jeremy don't have kids and don't have family in the area so they basically eat, breathe and sleep crossfit.  Jen easily has at least 50 lbs on me but I had noticed her really starting to lean out since the new year.  I made a point to let her know how fabulous she's looking these days (not in front of everyone because you never know if they really want to talk about it) and she told me that she actually hadn't lost any weight in the last couple months but she's lost inches and it's redistributing. You can really tell.  I recall first meeting her at the end of last year and she'd been doing crossfit for a year already and I thought "Hmmmm...really?"  Because she was still SO big.  People like me should know better.  Last night we were talking about her progress and she made a comment that my clothes were looking a little baggy so I confessed that I've back to try to lose weight and told her a snapshot of my history...basically that I lost and have now regained 70 lbs.  She was very sympathetic and invited me inside.  She keeps her "fat picture" up on the fridge and wanted to share with me how far she'd come.  Holy rolls batman!  She was a really big girl.  She went on to tell me that she lost all of it, got the plastic surgery on her arms and boobs and then proceeded to regain most of it back so she totally gets where I'm coming from.  She invited me to "bring a friend day" at her crossfit gym to try it out.  She kept it open ended because she knows people like me aren't great with follow through and it may take time to build up the courage.  But I've decided to take her up on her offer.  I don't know when.  Maybe not for a little while, but eventually.  It also reminded me to keep my judgment in check AND to not be afraid to reach out to people.  You can find support where you least expect it.

Other than get drunk, we did very little over the weekend because I have strep throat.  Bah!  I've been drinking a lot of hot tea because I'm trying to avoid cough drops at 12 calories a pop.

I've had about 6 of these this weekend.  UGH.

I also geeked out a little bit over the weekend.  I bought a Star Wars sweater in an XL because it was a mall store and they run small.  Honestly, I'm scared to try on the XL, worried that it won't fit.  It's the type that looks better bigger and since it's still 90 degrees out, I can hold off a little.  The other piece I got, I can wear now.

Told you I was a geek.

Maddie was sick last week so I totally blame the little petri dish for getting me sick, but I'm feeling a little better today.  It might because she and I had some awesome nurses.

I walked the girls to the bus stop so I got my first mile in this morning and I'm going to make Hubby walk with me tonight to get my second mile.  And so we begin another week...

Friday, August 28, 2015

Gym Etiquette Question

First, Can I get a Hell Yeah for going to the gym?  HELL YEAH!

Alright, so the workout wasn't GREAT but I went, I did, I sweated and that's SOMETHING.  It's been over a year since I went.  It's only the beginning.  I'm starting slow.  I'm going just twice a week and continue walking on the days I don't go.  I'll build up from there.  At least that's the plan.  I was bribing myself to go yesterday, promising myself a small Starbucks coffee after my workout.  I ended up not getting Starbucks and instead bought one of these.

Too lazy to rotate it.  Sorry.  But this is a flavored water drink with 0 calories and 0 sugar but a few vitamins.  Tasted pretty good.
But this leads me to my etiquette question.
So I love watching TV while I do cardio.  It makes the time go by faster.  My old choice was trashy reality TV but I can't even stomach that anymore.  Instead, I decided to try Game of Thrones.  Hubby watches it and loves it but I've never seen it so I started with Season 1, Episode 1.
Not sure if you all are familiar with this show but there is A LOT of violence and A LOT of boobies.  And some scenes are basically softcore porn.  I didn't realize that before I chose this particular show.  Trouble is, I like the show.  I watch it on my phone while I'm on an elliptical or something with my headphones in.  So my question is if it's gym appropriate?  I mean...there aren't any kids in my gym but I could see where some people might be offended by it if they look over and see particularly risky scenes.  On the other hand, it's on an iphone with headphones so they'll only see if it they actually look over to see what I'm watching.  In which case, they get what they deserve for their nosiness, right?  I don't want to be a bad gym person though so please let me know what the rule is on this.

No big plans this weekend.  A neighbor is turning 50 so we're having a little gathering for him.  My oldest daughter is sick so she's home with me today.  I'm trying to get an appointment with the doctor to make sure it's not strep throat.  I'm starting to feel crappy today too so hoping we don't spend the whole weekend sick.

Thursday, August 27, 2015

Thirsty Thursday

As part of my return to healthy living, I have given up alcohol during the week.  I still enjoy a couple glasses of wine on the weekend, which includes Friday night but that's the goal.  During my hiatus from banded life and really just not giving a fuck, I was having at least one glass of wine every night.  And I especially enjoyed Wine Down Wednesday.  The girls had gymnastics so I would hit a happy hour with Hubster or even by myself and enjoy a glass of wine and some appetizers.  (Seriously...can't figure out how I've regained all my weight.  Facepalm!)  Anywhoozle, breaking this routine has proven more difficult than I thought it would be.  The girls' gymnastics days moved so over the summer, I started Thirsty Thursday with the same basic premise as Wine Down Wednesday.  I'm proud to say that since surgery, I haven't partaken in the festivities but I still find myself wanting to.  SIGH.  Oh well.

Eating has been on target this week.  This is what I've been having for lunch.
Shrimp (only 6 after the first day) and Veggies with BBQ sauce.
This week, I've been eating 3 times a day.  My first meal is brunch around 10:30 or 11.  I have a snack around 3 or 4 and then dinner between 7-8.  Meal sizes are about the size as the lunch above and the snack is usually a turkey cheese roll up or some raw veggies with ranch.  I feel good about this plan but I suppose we'll see what the scale says next week.  I've been walking 2 miles a day with the dogs and I've noticed my bigger dog (I say "bigger" but that's only because the small dog is SO small.  My "big" dog is less than 25 lbs) is starting to lean out a little so that makes me feel like a good pup parent.
They love their new toy.  Passed right out after a rousing game of tug of war with it.  
Hubby has started walking with me on Mondays and Wednesdays so that's been good for him too.  He's trying to eat more how I eat and he's even talking about seeing the doc for a fill (he's banded) so we'll see if he actually goes through with it.  It seems we're never motivated at the same time which makes everything more difficult but I think we might actually be in sync this time.

Only one more day until Friday.  Can't wait!

Monday, August 24, 2015

Day 47 Weigh In

PreOp Diet Weigh In: 226
Surgery Day Weigh In: 218.5
Day 47 Weigh In: 205
Change Since Last Week: -1/2

ARGH!  I tended to graze this week and I think this ultimately led to small loss.  I will work to limit that this week and find other ways to deal with my stress!

Friday, August 21, 2015

Emotional Eating

I don't know why but I was feeling crazy low yesterday.  It was brought on by a series of small yet irritating things that I just couldn't seem to let go of.  Things like arguing with the School District's Transportation Department regarding the location of the girls' bus stop, dealing with a ridiculously condescending attorney at work, forgetting to email my insurance renewal to the mortgage company (did that again today), fretting over the state of the house (it's a mess!) and then eating my feelings.

I grazed more yesterday than I have since before the preop diet.  I had my coffee in the a.m. but had an early lunch of my glazed pork chop and rice (correct portion).  I don't know if it's because I ate early but then I had an early afternoon snack of cheese and crackers, THEN stopped at Starbucks and got a Tall Caramel Light Frappuccino and chocolate chip cookie!  And THEN I still ate dinner.  Dinner was healthy...steak kabob and mashed sweet potatoes.  I tracked all that on MFP and came up with 1160 calories for the day with WAY too much sugar.  Is this a better fuck up day than before?  Absolutely.  Is this why I got cut open again?  Absolutely NOT.  I've got to find a better way to deal with my emotions.

That being said, today is a new day and my meals are planned.  I'm going to power through any hormonal urges to drown sorrow in food.

Monday, August 17, 2015

Day 40 Weigh In

PreOp Diet Weigh In: 226
Surgery Day Weigh In: 218.5
Day 40 Weigh In: 205.5
Change Since Last Week: -2

Another 2 lbs down and officially 20 lbs down from presurgery weight!  Very happy about that.  The family and I went camping over the weekend.  This is not my favorite activity.  Don't get me wrong.  I like the outdoors.  I like hiking, kayaking, nature walking, the beach...the works.  But I also like air conditioning and my bed.  A LOT.  But the kids and Hubby love it so I sucked it up.  I did indulge in s'mores, about 3/4 of a hot dog, some chips and a muffin top.  But still 2 lbs down.  So loving it!

And so it is Monday...  Maddie had an orthodontist appointment today.  I can't get over how expensive these braces are but it went well...we're seeing good movement and she'll most likely be getting her bottom braces on before the end of the year (she only has top ones so far).  Hubby has a job interview tomorrow in Savannah (2 hours away) so it'll just be a girls' night tonight.  I hope the interview goes really well.  He's pretty miserable in his current position so fingers crossed they offer him the job.  We would definitely have some logistics to work out but I think it would be worth it.

I don't find camping relaxing.  I'm absolutely exhausted today and have a fully packed week ahead of me.  But I'm looking on the bright side and always searching for that happy place.

Friday, August 14, 2015

Week in Review 8/14/15

This has been a tiring week despite not doing a whole lot.  The kids are back in school so we're trying to find a routine that works for us.  I learned a couple things as the first week of school drew to a close:

  • Some parents are crazy lazy.
    • Let me elaborate on this one.  My girls are taking a bus to school this year.  The bus does not come into the neighborhood and instead picks up the kids at the entrance to the neighborhood.  We are pretty much the furthest from the entrance as you can get.  We are the ONLY ones who WALK to the bus stop.  Every other parent drives their kid to the bus stop and then drives home.  It's not even like they are their way to work or something.  I just find this insane.  We're the furthest and it's .4 miles to the bus stop.  That isn't THAT far.  If my fat ass can walk down their with the kids, so can yours.  So, of course, my little one (she's almost 8) asks why I won't drive them to the bus stop like the other parents.  I looked at her and said "Because it's just laziness.  There's no reason to drive to the bus stop."
  • Some parents are just crazy.
    • Most of the parents think I'm nuts because 1) I'm letting the kids walk home by themselves and 2) I don't actually stand there and wait for the bus to pick the kids up before walking home.  My oldest is in 5th grade.  I was staying home ALONE by the time I was in 5th grade.  And it wouldn't be so awful for my kids to walk home alone (it's just residential...they don't have to cross a street or anything) if YOUR kids were walking too instead of you picking them up.  And all you other drivers are causing a hazard with your line of cars waiting for the bus.  I walk the kids to the bus stop in the morning because I don't trust them to keep up the pace necessary for them to get to the stop on time.  But once we're there and there are 20 kids and approximately 30 parents, I see no reason to stay to make sure they actually don't go wandering off away from the crowd (they know better) and to get their butt on the bus.  They know if the bus doesn't come, they're supposed to walk home and get me.  I don't see what's so difficult here.
  • I've been walking 2 miles a day this week!  
    • Doing the math of .4 miles to the bus stop and I've taken them and picked them up for the first week, I've been walking almost 2 miles a day!  It feels good using some of those muscles again and the dogs are loving it!
My food has been pretty on target with a few exceptions.  The portions look good.  They've been looking like this (before and afters):
I ate the chicken but left a little rice.  Keep in mind, this is a small plate, not a dinner plate.  And those are my pups begging for food.  :)

Chicken on top of half a potato.

My girls love smoothies but I made way too much so decided to have one too.  I would say I drank about 4 ounces of it before I was full.  Ingredients:  Spinach, frozen mixed berries, 1 scoop banana protein powder and a little green tea.
I did NOT go back to the gym as I had planned.  As I've been walking the girls to school, I realized my shoes are no bueno.  I've got blisters all over my feet!  I'm buying a new pair this weekend so that should help.

Weekend plans including a camp out Saturday night.  I'm not big on camping.  I love the IDEA of camping but not so much the sleeping in a tent thing.  Then Sunday we have a cookout in the same state park with Hubby's coworkers.  I just hope the weather holds out.

Friday Funny:

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Coke For Weight Loss?

No, not THAT kind of coke.  I saw this article in Fortune about Coca Cola funding a study to show that weight loss is about exercise and not food.  The link is here but it's a short article, so I've copied and pasted it below.  I've added my comments in purple.

Coke is funding scientists with a controversial weight loss message

They say weight loss is more about exercise and less about your diet.

Coca-Cola is providing millions of dollars in funding for a non-profit group that argues weight-conscious Americans should be paying more attention to exercise and less attention to their diet, The New York Times reports.  This is why you should always, always, always look into who is paying for a particular study.  They aren't often completely unbiased.  They are looking for specific results so they will engineer a study to get it.  
“Most of the focus in the popular media and in the scientific press is, ‘Oh they’re eating too much, eating too much, eating too much’ — blaming fast food, blaming sugary drinks and so on,” says Steven N. Blair, vice president of the group, known as the Global Energy Balance Network, in a video. “And there’s really virtually no compelling evidence that that, in fact, is the cause.” This is actually just a bold faced lie.  It's not just that people are eating too much, it's WHAT they're eating.  And as far as compelling evidence goes... Try this study on for size here.  This is a metadata study meaning it's a STUDY OF STUDIES.  To lose weight, food is the biggest piece of it.  
Two universities that employ leaders of the Global Energy Balance Network told the Times that Coca-Cola had donated $1.5 million last year to start the organization, and that the company had provided close to $4 million in funding for other projects spearheaded by two members from the group.  That's a lot of money to throw in there to get your way.  
Health experts are calling Coca-Cola’s motives into question, especially in alongstanding era of declining soda sales.
“The Global Energy Balance Network is nothing but a front group for Coca-Cola,” Marion Nestle, author of the book Soda Politics and a professor of nutrition, food studies and public health at New York University, told the Times. “Coca-Cola’s agenda here is very clear: Get these researchers to confuse the science and deflect attention from dietary intake.” Eh.  She obviously isn't in favor of soda companies based on her book but she does have good credential so this one could go either way.  
This isn’t the first time Coca-Cola has tried to popularize the idea that its products are healthier than believed. In February, it was reported that fitness and nutrition experts wrote Coke-endorsed online pieces for American Hearth Month arguing that a mini-can of Coke could be a healthy treat. Last year, the American Beverage Association, which represents Coke and Pepsi, publishedfindings of a study that suggested diet soda could aid in weight loss, a result that’s been refuted elsewhere.  I won't get into all the bad stuff diet soda can do to you.  I think we all know that calorie wise, it's better but there are a lot of other effects of aspertame that aren't healthy.  

My personal view on this is that people should exercise for their health and it can aid in weight loss.  However, I'm of the opinion that food is 80% of the battle for weight loss and that's where the focus should be if your main goal is lowering the number on the scale.  

Monday, August 10, 2015

Day 33 Weigh In

PreOp Diet Weigh In: 226
Surgery Day Weigh In: 218.5
Day 33 Weigh In: 207.5
Change Since Last Week: -1.5

I'm happy with the 1.5 lb loss.  My sodium intake was a little high last week so I think I'm holding on to a little water.  I've been logging my food into My Fitness Pal.  I don't really care to see the calories I'm taking but I am interested in some of the other things like the protein, carbs, vitamins and things like that.  That's how I know my sodium is up so I'll be watching that more closely this week.  

I start back at the gym tomorrow.  It'll just be light cardio for now.  I still feel twinges here and there in the abdominal region so I'm going to wait until I'm completely pain free before I start lifting weights again.  On the off gym days, Hubby and I starting to walk.  He needs to get back on the fitness train too.  

The weekend was fairly uneventful.  We were going to organize the laundry room and while the shelves have been installed and there's stuff ON the shelves, it's not QUITE where I want it to be so it's still a work in progress.

Today was the first day of school for my girls.  Maddie is in 5th grade and Lori is in 3rd.  I'm not so worried about this year but next year means middle school for Maddie and that scares me to death!  I hope this year takes a really long time.  

Friday, August 7, 2015

Week in Review

I had a productive week overall and am feeling good about it.  My eating was pretty much on target (tried new Italian restaurant last night and I know I ate a bit too much but it was delicious so I don't regret it).  For the most part, my meals looked like this:

I took a pic next to the mouse so you could get an idea as to the size of the plate.  This is left over meatloaf, jalapeno hummus and carrot chips.  I had a few carrots left over.  
I also took an opportunity this week to organize my pantry and under the kitchen sink.  It was to the point where things were falling and I couldn't find anything.  It was just a wreck.  I wish I would've thought to take "before" pics but I'm not that smart.

Some things you learn when you organize a pantry...
  1. I have about a million yards of aluminum foil.
  2. I have way too much maple syrup that all expires in about a week so the kids are going to be eating LOTS of pancakes.
  3. As someone who doesn't bake often, I have too much baking STUFF.  
In other news, my daughters did well enough during the competition season to earn a spot on the Wall of Fame in the gymnastics gym.  They're so excited.  I snapped a pic of the wall but had an awful glare on Maddie's pic.  Oh well.

Next week Preview:  I return to the gym...

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

First NSV and A Look Back

NSV #1: I grabbed a pair of jeans out of my dresser yesterday and they were size 16 and fit.  They're a little snug in the thighs but zipped right up and I could button them with ease.  I can't wait until I can wear the rest of my wardrobe again.

Sometimes to see how great things are, you need to look back.  The nice thing about this blog is it goes back aways...So sit back, imagine hearing the doodle-doodle music and the wavy lines as we take a trip through time and compare where I was then to where I am today.  Updates are in purple.

1) If you had 3 wishes, what would they be and why?

  1. Out of debt - Holy Cow!!!  We haven't used credit for anything in years but it still feels like we're drowning. We have been debt free for a couple years now and actually have money in a savings account!
  2. That I could give my girls everything they want in life...not just money but activities, confidence, the absolutely best educations, encouragement, self esteem, healthy lifestyles...the list goes on and on.  We have! The girls are in gymnastics and swim and the little on wants to try soccer.  We live in the best school district in the state and they know they're awesome.  And so weight issues for either!

3. If you had a crystal ball or could know one thing about the future - what would it be?
Currently, that I'm approved for my surgery, all goes well and I lose a bunch of weight.  On a day where I'm not so consumed, that we have made it out of debt, own our home and my kids are playing with their friends in our HUGE backyard. I was approved for lapband surgery and for lapband removal and for revision to sleeve.  I DID lose a bunch of weight and then gained a bunch of weight and am losing weight again.  I have made it out of debt, we own our home and the kids play often with their friends in our FRONT yard and at the neighbors' houses and in the street and ride their bikes and all that other wonderful stuff kids do.  

9/2/10 - 10 things i like
Dogs - I'm a dog person.  Don't have any of my own yet (we rent - waiting to buy before we get a puppy) but I think they're just so sweet and ask very little of their human family except for love and treats.  I have two pups is 2 years old and the other 9 months and we have a fenced in yard so they can run.

I'm ready to leave AZ.  I'm tired of not having seasons.  I want to move somewhere where leaves actually change colors and you need a coat in the winter and it's not 75 freakin' degrees at Christmas!  I know tons of people love this about AZ but I'm just tired of it. This summer really just got to was just too hot for too long and I've had it.  Not to mention the fact that Phoenix has just gotten too big for my tastes.  I'm a smaller town girl...I'd like to actually meet my neighbors and maybe have some couple friends to hang out with.  Is that so much to ask for????  Blah!  We moved to Florida in December 2012.  And we actually do have seasons here in Jacksonville.  It's humid as all get out and it does get really hot but we get storms and weather.  There are a few freezes every winter and we actually have to wear jackets and gloves some mornings.  It's a smaller town, I know my neighbors and the kids can even play outside with friends without (too much) worry.  

My brother in law had his surgery yesterday and the outcome is not good.  The tumor had already spread throughout his brain and it is malignant.  I don't know the name of the type of cancer it is but it's very bad and there isn't much they can do.  Radiation will only prolong his life, not save it.  The doctor is giving him 6 months to a year to live.  Apparently, it's the same kind of cancer Ted Kennedy had and he made it 10 months.  My brother in law is still alive, he's still working and even coaches his daughter's softball team.  He's defied the odds and they've made wonderful memories the last 5 years.  They just took him off chemo because it was causing kidney failure so we'll see what happens from here.  

All these things that seemed frustrating or awful at the time have worked themselves out.  All these obstacles and concerns have been addressed.  Do we still have problems?  Of course!  Everyone does and they change depending on where you are in life.  It helps to see that it doesn't matter what those problems are.  They can be overcome.  It may take A LOT of effort on your part or no effort at all in some cases.  But things can get better if you just keep trying and keep the hope.  

Monday, August 3, 2015

Day 26 Weigh In

PreOp Diet Weigh In: 226
Surgery Day Weigh In: 218.5
Day 19 Weigh In: 209

I lost 2.5 lbs this week!  I'm very happy with that kind of progress.  Eating wasn't as on par over the weekend.  Hubby and I celebrated our 12 year wedding anniversary and went out to a nice dinner without the kiddos.  I had a couple glasses of wine, some appetizer and some dinner as well.  Of course, we were there over 2 hours to accommodate all of that.  We reminisced about all the years we've been together (16), remembering our crappy apartments, weird friends and bizarre jobs.  We've come a long way but I'd say we're still doing pretty good.  We saw Ant-Man with the kiddos on Sunday which was a surprisingly good movie.  I had some popcorn there.  So after a weekend of indulging (I love that having some popcorn and having some wine is indulging!), I still lost for the week.  It feels good!

This morning, I've had my coffee but I have my chicken and veggies for lunch and there's no feeling of "getting back on track" because I don't feel like I was ever really off track.

So I had ordered Bariatric Advantage Multi Vitamin from Amazon and misread the description.  It turns out they are NOT chewable.  I tried taking one over the weekend and thought I was going to die.  SO...if any of you do not have issues with larger pills (they're big but not horse pill big), I am more than happy to give you the rest of mine (268 pills) for free.  I'll even throw in shipping.  I'd hate to see them go to waste.  If you're interested, please leave me a comment.'s just another Monday...